Dichotomies — the good, bad and the ugly

Touching, concerned  and always caring Facebook asks me:  How can we spy on you today?  I mean…What’s on your mind?

Dichotomies on my mind. Lots of them.

The basic idea of dichotomy:

To go left or right, that is the question.

Now we need to realize that there are good and bad dichotomies, positive and destructive, harmonizing and polarizing.

Some of the most popular ones — because they further well-known and much practiced agonistic energies, make it easier for us to quarrel (still one of mankind’s favorite sports) — are rich-poor, male-female.

These are polarizing dichotomies, creating tension and dissent.

With them we move further away from each other, stand in far off corners, view The Other through  military field glasses. Then we discharge our verbal missiles, tirades, accusations and complaints. This happens not least on social media where the temperature is always high, untempered by the presence of real bodies which usually add an element of decency and consideration.

In short, such dichotomies give us ammo so that we can continue ranting, shouting, accusing.

Rich-poor is complicated and one can, and should, argue that it is not wrong to reason in those terms. I agree.

Male-female is different and much more complicated.

Some suggest, with a big dose of populism, that “male” implies “rich” and “female” implies “poor”.  That depends on who is talking. Place a loud-voiced, high-heeled feminist beside some poor bastard from Gambia and take a good look at the picture. Two different kinds of poverty.

Now I am myself starting to heat up and become polarized. That’s exactly what we don’t want, so let me just say that there are much better dichotomies than male-female .. if we want to move forward towards benign harmony rather than malignant (but FUN!) discord.

And that’s a rather big IF.

Let us turn eastward.

While we in the West talk about gender and men vs. women our oriental sisters and brothers talk about Yin and Yang. It’s a different planet of thought! Just look at the Yin Yang symbol.

To begin with, it is round. Not a square or rectangle.

It has two halves, kind of,  but they are curvy and flowing, not boxy. They look like playful fishes chasing each other. No straight lines anywhere.

What is more, they contain their opposites.; the white “fish” has a black part and the black a white. So even thought it looks black and white there is also grey here.

These aspects already defuse polarization and black/white thinking. They say in effect: “You contain your opposite and shadow”.

To glance for a moment into the political domain, I find it interesting, and significant, to see how much RAGE Donald Trump has aroused by saying something very basic like “there is blame on both sides”.

Why is this not popular? For many reasons, but one root reason I believe is our lack of Yin-Yang thinking plus our love of black-white thinking. We just don’t well understand what is round, and love what is square too much.

In this transformation of Yin and Yang have already turned more “Western”, more stiff, immobile, with more sharp, hurting corners.

The next step is the home base, our bad old, all to familiar camp fire.
THIS is our most used dichotomy. No roundness, no shared opposites, no fishes,  no forgiving! Just two enemies facing each other in black and white.

Going back to the round Yin and Yang we can also imagine it as a coiffure.

What is also interesting is that Yin and Yang turn into each other. Yin starts small, in a careful way, then grows bigger and bigger until it turns into its opposite.

Well, not opposite. This is another great thing. Yin and Yang don’t oppose, they complement.

Does my right hand oppose my left? No…

Is my opposable thumb the enemy of my other four fingers? No…

Those are really stupid questions. But they are only stupid because in some areas we understand the flow of Yin and Yang and how they help each other. In other areas, we don’t.

And don’t even WANT to.

If we are honest, we have to admit that a part of us ENJOYS polarization – Enmity – Opposition – Strife – Battle – Quarreling – Debating.

Polarizing is FUN! That’s the war-cry of this part of us.

Another part wants peace, harmony and co-operation. But that part has to live together with the fight-enjoying, belligerent part.

This is not so strange, and even not so bad. What is regrettable is that the parts don’t know each other. It’s like Yang not knowing that it has a Yin spot, and vice versa.

WHITE, let’s say “the good guys” (supposedly totally without blame) don’t know their black side, and usually BLACK (the “crooks”) never hear about their white side.

[A very interesting reflection about the black called “psychopathy” is found in THIS VIDEO.]

There is a wonderfully saying that I loved long before I understood it. Its very sound, so musical, charmed me.

“There but for the grace of God go I.”

It’s a fascinating, mysterious sentence, and now I have also learned what it means.

Look at that poor bastard there in the street. It could have been me, if I didn’t had been more lucky in life. His fate could have been mine..

No, life and success and happiness is not just about luck. It also takes intelligence and wisdom.

But realizing that we who see ourselves as “white” (on the inside, not talking about skin color here) also have “black” in us, that we are actually, colorwise, GREY,  and that life is more like fishes waxing and waning than a rectangle, and finally that we probably enjoy violence and opposition more than we think — ALSO takes intelligence and feeling.

So let us use our intelligence for differentiating between benign, harmonious dichotomies and belligerent, polarizing ones.

Even if, or precisely BECAUSE the latter often are more exciting and enjoyable.

Harmonize or polarize?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *